In this section we answer common questions about dying.
Learn more about:
- How long have I got?
- How does palliative care help?
- Who will I see for my care?
- Could complementary therapies help me?
- What does “dying well” mean?
- What is dying going to be like?
- How will I know the end is near?
- What if I feel distressed?
Knowing that you have a short time to live raises many difficult questions. Sometimes, you may not be sure if you want to know the answers. We discuss some of the common concerns you may have.
How long have I got?
The first thing some people will want to know is how long they have left to live. Others prefer not to know. It’s a very personal decision.
Knowing can help you prepare for and plan the time you have left. If you want to know, you can ask your doctor. Because everyone is different, a doctor can only ever give you an estimate (called a prognosis) based on what usually happens to people in your situation. But they can’t say exactly what will happen to you.
Some doctors may sound very definite about how long you have left to live, but it is only ever an estimate. Other doctors may be hesitant to give you a prognosis in case they overestimate or underestimate the time. They will probably talk about the time in terms of days, days to weeks, weeks to months, or months to years.
Why it can be good to know
Being told you probably don’t have long to live is difficult. But having a sense of how much time may be left can give you a chance to focus on what is most important to you.
If you live longer than the estimated time, you may feel lucky to be living beyond that time or you may feel unsettled, like you’re waiting to die.
It may help to talk about how you’re feeling with trusted family or friends, the palliative care team or your doctor. There are counsellors who specialise in facing end of life.
My doctors haven’t ‘given me a date’ but I’m preparing for the day. I’m getting my affairs in order and trying to make sense of things.
Agnes
→ READ MORE: Who will I see for my care?
Video: What is end of life?
Podcast: Living with Dying
Listen to more episodes of our podcast for people affected by cancer
Fiona Wiseman, Senior Social Worker, Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre, VIC; Grace Berwald, Consumer; Peta Brydon, Metastatic McGrath Breast Care Clinical Nurse Consultant, The Kinghorn Cancer Centre, NSW; Kate Bunyan, Social Worker, Psychosocial Lead, Cancer and Palliative Supportive Care, Canberra Region Cancer Centre, ACT; Hayden Christie, Medical Oncologist and Clinical Director Cancer Care Service and Clinical Lead of the VAD Service for Wide Bay Hospital and Health Service, QLD; John Clements, Consumer; Claire Davies, Spiritual Care Practitioner, Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre, VIC; Joanne Dean, Nurse Practitioner, PEACE Team, Clare Holland House, ACT; A/Prof Michael Franco, Medical Oncologist and Palliative Medicine Physician, Deputy Head – Monash Medical School, Monash University, VIC; Dr Sally Greenaway, WSLHD Director of Supportive and Palliative Care, Senior Staff Specialist Clinical Haematology and Clinical Ethics Service, NSW; Maree Grier, Clinical Psychologist, Royal Brisbane and Women’s Hospital, QLD; Dr Catherine Joyce, National Manager, Advance Care Planning Australia; Mattesse Kitchin, Consumer; Penny Neller, Project Manager, End of Life Law for Clinicians, Australian Centre for Health Law Research, Queensland University of Technology, QLD; Caitriona Nienaber 13 11 20 Consultant, Cancer Council WA; Palliative Care Australia; A/Prof Joel Rhee, Head of Discipline of General Practice, School of Clinical Medicine, University of New South Wales, NSW.
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