Seeking support
Although grief is an intensely personal experience, most people find they do need some support from other people.
− Lee
You may draw support from your family, friends or others in your social circle, particularly those who supported you while the person was dying, but sometimes it helps to talk to people who aren’t directly involved in your life.
Learn more about:
- Peer support services
- Getting professional help
- Useful websites that can support you during grieving
Peer support services
Sometimes you may feel that your family and friends don’t really understand your grief or aren’t interested in hearing about it anymore, or you might feel that you can’t be entirely honest about your feelings with them.
Meeting other people who have had similar experiences to you can be worthwhile. You may feel supported and relieved to know that others understand what you are going through and that you are not alone.
Ways for you and your family to connect with others for mutual support and to share information include:
- face-to-face support groups – often held in community centres or hospitals
- online discussion forums – where people can connect with each other at any time – for example, you can join the Cancer Council Online Community
- telephone support groups – for bereavement, facilitated by trained health professionals.
In these support settings, people often feel they can speak openly and share tips. You may find that you are comfortable talking about your experiences, your relationships with friends and family, and your hopes and fears for the future.
Ask your nurse or social worker or call Cancer Council 13 11 20 to find out about suitable support groups and peer support programs in your area.
Getting professional help
Most people cope with grief through the support of family and friends and sometimes a support group. However, you may want to seek professional help if you are finding your pain unbearable, if you are struggling to function after a time, or if you feel stuck and unable to move forward.
Bereavement counselling can help you learn to understand your reactions as part of the natural course of grief. During the sessions, you can explore a range of strategies for adjusting to the changes in your life. The counselling is usually provided by a professional counsellor, therapist or psychologist with experience in supporting people who are grieving.
Counselling may not be appropriate immediately or very soon after the death, so if you feel unable to function at that time, talk to your doctor first.
| You can call Cancer Council 13 11 20 or ask your palliative care team for help accessing bereavement counselling. GriefLine offers confidential telephone and online grief counselling every day between midday and 3 am – call 1300 845 745. If you need crisis support or are feeling suicidal, contact Lifeline 13 11 14. |
Useful websites that can support you during grieving
Click on the icon below to download a PDF booklet on understanding grief
Instructions for downloading and reading EPUB files
Apple devices
The iBooks application must be installed on your Apple device before you can read the EPUB.
Different ways to download an EPUB file to your Apple device:
- email EPUB files to yourself and transfer the attachment to iBooks.
- copy EPUB files into DropBox (or a similar service) and use the DropBox app to send them to iBooks.
- open EPUB files directly from Mobile Safari and open them in iBooks, where they are saved automatically by downloading the EPUB from the website.
Need more help? Visit: http://support.apple.com/kb/HT4059
Kobo
To download an EPUB file to your Kobo from a Windows computer:
- download and save the EPUB directly onto your desktop.
- connect your Kobo to your computer using the USB cable and tap “Connect” on your eReader.
- select “Open folder to view files” to view the contents of your Kobo.
- navigate to where you have stored your EPUB file in “Finder”, in documents or downloads, and drag and drop it into the Kobo window. You can now disconnect your Kobo to read the eBook.
To download an EPUB to your Kobo from a Mac:
- download and save the EPUB directly onto your desktop.
- connect your Kobo to your computer using the USB cable and tap “Connect” on your eReader.
- open your “Finder” application.
- select “Kobo eReader” from the listed devices to view the contents of your Kobo.
- navigate to where you have stored your EPUB file in “Finder”, probably in documents or downloads, and drag and drop it into the Kobo window. You can now disconnect your Kobo to read the eBook.
Turn on your Kobo and your EPUB will be located in “eBooks”, while a PDF will be located in “Documents”.
Need more information? Visit: http://www.kobo.com/help/koboaura/response/?id=3784&type=3
Sony Reader
To download an EPUB file on your Sony Reader™:
- ensure you have already installed the Reader™ Library for PC/Mac software
- select the eBook you want from our website and click the link to download it.
- connect the Reader™ to your computer.
- open the Reader™ Library software and click “Library” in the left-hand pane and select the eBook to view it.
Need more help? Visit: https://au.readerstore.sony.com/apps_and_devices/
Amazon Kindle 2nd Generation devices
EPUB files can’t be read on the Amazon Kindle™. However, like most eReaders, Kindle™ 2nd Generation devices are able to display PDFs. We recommend that you download the PDF version of this booklet if you would like to read it on a Kindle™.
To transfer a PDF to your Kindle™ via USB cable from your computer or Mac:
- download the PDF directly onto your computer.
- connect the USB cable to your computer’s USB port, and the micro USB end of the cable to your Kindle™. Note: the Kindle™ won’t be available as a reading device while it is connected to your computer until it has been disconnected.
- open the Kindle™ drive and several folders will appear inside. The “Documents” folder is where you will need to copy or drag the PDF to.
- safely eject your Kindle™ from your computer and unplug the USB cable. Your content will appear on the Home Screen.
Kindle also provides a Kindle Personal Documents Service that allows users to send documents as an attachment directly to your eReader. For more information on this service, visit http://www.amazon.com/gp/help/customer/display.html/ref=help_search_1-1?ie=UTF8&nodeId=200767340&qid=1395967989&sr=1-1
For more information on accessing a PDF on your Kindle™, visit www.amazon.com/manageyourkindle, log in to your account and click on Personal Document Settings.
Need more help? Visit https://www.amazon.com/gp/help/customer/display.html?nodeId=200375630
Android and PC
You can also download and open eBooks on Android devices and PCs with appropriate apps or software installed. Suitable eReader apps for Android include Google Play Books, FBReader and Moon+ Reader. Suitable software for PCs include Calibre and Adobe Digital Editions.
This information was last reviewed in April 2017
Support services
Caring for someone with cancer
Speak to a health professional or to someone who has been there, or find a support group or forum
Cancer Council Online Community
A community forum – a safe place to share stories, get tips and connect with people who understand
Cancer information
Emotions and cancer
People who are affected by cancer in some way can experience a range of emotions, that can be very challenging to deal with at times. Learn more.
End of life
This information may help you better cope with end of life, or support someone who may be dying with cancer
