You may celebrate the end of cancer treatment and acknowledge that it has been a difficult period for everyone; this is particularly important for teenagers. Your children have lived with worry for months and may need your permission to relax and have fun again. Thank them for their role in keeping the family going and supporting you.
| Talk about your recovery | Let the family know how you’re feeling emotionally and physically so they understand if you’re not bouncing back as quickly as they expected. It may be helpful to remind your family that treatment effects are likely to last for a while after treatment finishes. |
| Share emotions | Keep using the emotions thermometer if you have found it helpful. Be open about your feelings, such as if you’re feeling anxious before a check-up or disappointed that you couldn’t attend something. This may encourage your kids to talk about their own emotions. |
| Take recovery at your own pace | Do things at your own pace, and avoid any pressure to return to “normal” activities. You may want to ask yourself: Am I doing what fulfils me? Am I doing what I want to do? What is important to me? |
| Adapt family routines | Explain any changes to the family’s lifestyle to your children and negotiate responsibility where possible. During your recovery, you may be able to encourage your family to join you in making some healthy lifestyle changes – for example, you could do light exercise together, or make healthy changes to the kids’ diets as well as your own. |
| Manage expectations | Expect good days and bad days – for both the adults and the children in the family. Focus on one day at a time. |
Looking after yourself
If you are a parent who has finished cancer treatment, you may want to focus your attention on your children, but it is important to look after your own wellbeing as well. These strategies can help.
- Consider joining a support group. You may find it helpful to meet other people who have been
- through cancer and understand how you are feeling. Find out about Cancer Council’s Peer Connect program by calling 13 11 20. They may be able to put you in touch with someone else in a similar situation.
- Read real-life stories of how other people have responded to a cancer diagnosis.
- Take part in a survivorship program or event. To find out what is available in your area, contact Cancer Council 13 11 20.
→ READ MORE: Answering key questions about after treatment
Podcast: Family Dynamics and Cancer
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Joanna Fardell, Senior Research Fellow and Deputy Director, The Behavioural Sciences Unit, School of Clinical Medicine, UNSW Medicine, UNSW, NSW; Dr Diana Adams, Medical Oncologist, Macarthur Cancer Therapy Centre and GenesisCare Campbelltown, NSW; Emma Bowne, 13 11 20 Consultant, Cancer Council SA; Ken Colbert, Consumer; Cara Dahl, Team Leader – Online Support, Cancer Hub, and ACA Registered Counsellor, NSW; Elizabeth Egan, Clinical Nurse Consultant – Oncology, St John of God Subiaco Hospital, WA; Dr Maria Ftanou, Director, Psychosocial Oncology Program, Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre, VIC; Nat Fuss, Senior Clinician, Canteen, SA; Helena Hobson, Senior Social Worker, Cancer Centre, Fiona Stanley Hospital and South Metropolitan Health Service, WA; Nadine Macbeth, Social Work Team Leader, Cancer and Chronic Care, Westmead Hospital, NSW; Damian Ragusa, General Manager – Services and Programs, Camp Quality; The Team at Redkite; Alexandra Wright, Consumer.
We would also like to thank the health professionals, consumers, organisations and editorial teams who have worked on previous editions of this title, and we are grateful to the parents and young people whose real-life stories have added to the richness and relevance of this booklet.
We also thank and acknowledge Dr Paula K Rauch, American Cancer Society, Macmillan Cancer Support, Jessica Watt and Diane McGeachy for permission to use their work as source material.
View the Cancer Council NSW editorial policy.
