Families often describe the days and weeks after their child’s cancer diagnosis as overwhelming. Among the many confronting decisions they face is how to talk to the child about their illness.
Be honest
Children with cancer tend to feel more secure when the adults around them are open – hiding the truth to protect a child may lead to greater anxiety.
Match explanations to your child’s age
How much information you share with your child will depend on their age and maturity. Keep your initial explanations simple and take your cue from your child as to whether they want to know more. The first conversation will be followed by many others, so you will have the opportunity to give more detail as the need arises. Include your child in discussions about their treatment and encourage them to ask questions.
Seek guidance
Someone from the paediatric oncology team will be able to provide guidance and assist you with these discussions.
For younger children, some hospitals have therapists (may be called child life therapists) who teach children strategies to manage their illness and can help explain the diagnosis and treatment.
If you have a child with cancer, please visit Cancer Hub.
Older children and teenagers
Children and teenagers will respond to their cancer diagnosis in different ways. Fear, anger or sadness are all common reactions.
Older children may want to seek out information themselves. You can point them to Cancer Hub and reliable organisations such as Camp Quality, Canteen and Redkite (Learn about other support services).
Support for families
Remember that your child’s hospital team is there to support the family as well. The social worker or cancer nurse specialist can let you know what support services are available, particularly if you need to travel long distances for treatment.
Some organisations have developed resources for parents of children diagnosed with cancer, including:
- Paediatric Integrated Cancer Service.
- Cancer Australia’s Childrens Homepage.
Share decisions
As much as possible, include your child in discussions about their treatment, and encourage them to ask questions.
→ READ MORE: When a sibling has cancer
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Joanna Fardell, Senior Research Fellow and Deputy Director, The Behavioural Sciences Unit, School of Clinical Medicine, UNSW Medicine, UNSW, NSW; Dr Diana Adams, Medical Oncologist, Macarthur Cancer Therapy Centre and GenesisCare Campbelltown, NSW; Emma Bowne, 13 11 20 Consultant, Cancer Council SA; Ken Colbert, Consumer; Cara Dahl, Team Leader – Online Support, Cancer Hub, and ACA Registered Counsellor, NSW; Elizabeth Egan, Clinical Nurse Consultant – Oncology, St John of God Subiaco Hospital, WA; Dr Maria Ftanou, Director, Psychosocial Oncology Program, Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre, VIC; Nat Fuss, Senior Clinician, Canteen, SA; Helena Hobson, Senior Social Worker, Cancer Centre, Fiona Stanley Hospital and South Metropolitan Health Service, WA; Nadine Macbeth, Social Work Team Leader, Cancer and Chronic Care, Westmead Hospital, NSW; Damian Ragusa, General Manager – Services and Programs, Camp Quality; The Team at Redkite; Alexandra Wright, Consumer.
We would also like to thank the health professionals, consumers, organisations and editorial teams who have worked on previous editions of this title, and we are grateful to the parents and young people whose real-life stories have added to the richness and relevance of this booklet.
We also thank and acknowledge Dr Paula K Rauch, American Cancer Society, Macmillan Cancer Support, Jessica Watt and Diane McGeachy for permission to use their work as source material.
View the Cancer Council NSW editorial policy.
