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Loss of sexual pleasure
During and after cancer treatment, some people find that although they can still have sex, they do not enjoy it as much. This may be for emotional reasons, such as worrying or self-consciousness, or from a physical cause, such as fatigue, nerve damage, or painful intercourse. As side effects improve many people start to enjoy sex again.
People who have had a body part such as a breast or prostate removed, may need to explore touch and stimulation to other parts of the body to feel ready for sex.
Tips for increasing your enjoyment of sex
- Consider touching, hugging and kissing. This is a chance to feel close to your partner without expectations of sexual penetration.
- Choose a time when you won’t be disturbed and set the mood with soft lighting, candles and music.
- Place your partner’s hands and fingers on the areas that arouse and excite you – or touch those areas yourself.
- Change your normal positions to more comfortable ones that increase stimulation.
- Try using a personal lubricant with a water or silicone base, e.g. Pjur or Astroglide.
- If you are having difficulty reaching orgasm, see these tips.
- Accept that you may not reach orgasm every time. Take the pressure off by focusing on giving and receiving pleasure in different ways.
- Use mindfulness techniques to help you stay in the moment with your partner. Listen to our meditation and relaxation audio tracks.
Listen to our podcast on Sex and Cancer
Additional resources
Helena Green, Clinical Sexologist and Counsellor, inSync for Life, WA; Anita Brown-Major, Occupational Therapist, Thrive Rehab, VIC; Karina Campbell, Consumer; Nicole Kinnane, Nurse Consultant, Gynae-oncology Services, Peter MacCallum Cancer Centre, VIC; Jessica Medd, Senior Clinical Psychologist, Headway Health and Concord Hospital, NSW; Chris Rivett, 13 11 20 Consultant, Cancer Council SA; Kath Schubach, Urology Nurse Practitioner, President – Australia and New Zealand Urological Nurses Society (ANZUNS), VIC; Prof Jane Ussher, Chair, Women’s Health Psychology, Translational Health Research Institute (THRI), School of Medicine, Western Sydney University, NSW; Maria Voukelatos, Consumer. We would like to thank the health professionals, consumers and editorial teams who have worked on previous editions of this title.
View the Cancer Council NSW editorial policy.
View all publications or call 13 11 20 for free printed copies.
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